In My Time of Dying
by Dreamlesss
Summary: Its the end of the war. Draco Malfoy has been secretly on the light side for a year. Will he get the happily ever after he needs? Or will he be bound to stay forever alone from the war aftermath.?
1. Chapter 1

_AN; This is my first Draco and Hermione story. This is not going to be long or anything like that. Really short and simple. Hope you like it.!_

_Disclaimer; I do not own anything from Harry Potter._

* * *

**Chapter 1**

I knew this day would come. I've been ready for this for a while now. I even have reached that point in my life that I actually welcome this moment.

'Sectumsempra!' He screams the curse out.

'Shit,' I curse as the familiar sharp, knifing pain rushes trough my body. He wants to see me suffer. He saw it in my thoughts that I am ready to die. He decided not to give me what I want. I shouldn't be surprised at all, it's so typical of him.

'My boy you thought that you'd get the easy way out. But no, I want you to think for your last living minutes about what you did. Maybe I'll even heal you and do it all over again. You won't get out of this. Not this time,'he says as though reading my thoughts. I am actually sure that he read them. I hate this man. No, wait, he is not a man. He is not even human. He is a Thing, a pathetic Thing.

Lying here and bleeding to death, I rush over this day's events.

**_2 hours earlier_**

'You have an hour to give me over Draco Malfoy, if you want to spare some lives and gather your strength I know you will make the right choice..' Voldemorts voice echoed in my head. Shit, so he knows now. Well I can't say that I didn't see this coming. But some little part of me still hoped that I could get out of this war alive. He didn't notice that I turned on him and my family a year ago but knowing him he probably knew it for some while now. That evil man just waited for the right moment. I look over to Hermione and see that she is looking at me with terrified expression on her face. I just smile weakly at her.

'No. No. No! You can't be possibly thinking to go and hand yourself over. I won't let you.' She shouted at me. I could hear that she is scared. She came to sit beside me and took my hand in hers. She knows me too well.

A year ago she cornered me in one of our Death Eater fights that Voldemort had planned against Harry Potter and the Order. She wanted to reason with me to change to the light side or be a spy for them. She told me all kind of reasons why should I. Of course I didn't need any reasons to change sides she got me on her side right after she asked me to. I would do anything she asked me to and the fact that she still believed in me made me agree. I was so touched but I would never tell her that, not even now. So, basically I changed sides because of her. Because I love her and have loved her for years now and this is the other thing I will never tell her. At least not until this is all over. So for the last year I was meeting secretly up with her and some of the Order members and we exchanged information. Some days I just spent with her talking about everything but in the same time about absolutely nothing. It didn't take her long to start to trust me and become my friend. Friends were never enough for me but I didn't want to develop something between us because of the war. I didn't want her to get hurt. So it was for the best to distance her from me. I didn't let myself go further than friendship line allowed me to, no matter how much I wanted too. Sometimes when I got this feeling that she might feel something for me I would automatically shut her out and start to call her names basically being my old self. First few times it had worked but after some while she just saw trough me. Then it got all intense between us and I couldn't control myself anymore. I kissed her. To my surprise she didn't pull away. Kissing her felt like heaven like there is nothing better in this world. It felt so right, I felt so alive. I had slipped. The realization hit me at that moment when she let a moan escape her lips. I pulled away from her and just stormed off not saying a thing. I had messed things up. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. So the next time I saw her I apologized to her and said it was a mistake. I saw that I had hurt her but she just shrugged me off and told me it was alright and that she understands. For some while it was as nothing ever happened between us but that didn't last. The last few times that I saw her it got touchy feely between us. Of course I would never let myself get too close to her again but we had our moments with words that softened mine and her heart at times. I was pulled out of my thoughts by Hermione. I realize that I hadn't replied to her yet.

'You can't be possibly suggesting to me that I should stay here and get us all killed. Besides half of the Order will happily give me up ignoring the fact that I am on their side they will never defend me. They are not you Hermione. ' I said in a soft voice and brushed my fingers against her cheek. I shouldn't be doing that at all. I just can't help it, she is way too cute.

'I said I won't let you go. Harry won't let you leave too and you know that a lot here does what Harry says.' She said in a really serious voice and I knew better than to start and reason with her. She would just go to Potter and say something and he wouldn't let me leave too. That means I have to talk to Potter alone. I know that I can only reason with him if Hermione isn't around.

'Ok, but let me talk to Potter… alone.' I say to her and as on cue he showed in front of us.

'Malfoy,' he said in civil tone 'we should talk.' I nod in agreement and we make our self's out of the Great hall. We walk for some while making sure that nobody is following us or would eavesdrop on our conversation. Potter is the first one to break the silence.

'I am guessing that you want to go and I can't stop you, right?' he said putting his hands in his trousers pockets. I just nod in agreement.

'And I am guessing you have a plan?' he spoke again looking at me curiously.

'Certainly, I want you to follow me in to the woods under your invisibility cloak. He wants to kill me but I am guessing that he'll torture me first and that is your cue to kill him.' I say casually not even feeling slightness fear of dying or Voldemort torturing me.

'You think he won't be prepared that I'll be hiding somewhere and waiting for my opportunity to pop out and kill him and save you?' he says and for a moment I think that he might actually care if I die but I shrug that thought off as soon as it entered my mind. He's only concerned for himself no to be spotted before he has the opportunity to kill the Dark Wizard.

'He doesn't know that you have Invisibility cloak you dumbass. Probably he would think that if you let me go so easily that I am not important to you Golden Boy and even if he would suspect something he wouldn't see you because of the cloak. But to be sure I say you still keep your distance long enough to have a shot at actually killing him with one curse.'

'Alright, sounds like a plan..' Harry said and started to walk away.

'Yo Potter, remember stay under your cloak and don't mess it up. I wouldn't want to go as a total waste.' I said and smirked with my all too well know Malfoy smirk.

Potter didn't say anything back just nodded his head in an agreement. We exchanged one last 'good luck' glance at each other before walking our separate ways. I wasn't too bothered to go back to Great hall as much as I wanted to. I knew the moment I stepped in there she would come running and not let me leave. Ah she could be a pain in the arse like that but she wouldn't be Hermione without that right? I slowly made my way to the Forbidden Forrest taking in last breaths of my life. I am, well I guess I was always prepared and waiting for this moment. At least I won't go in a way I thought I would. I would go by doing something good. I know I may sound ridiculous because there is a chance that I may, maybe, possibly survive. I won't get my hopes up just in case Potter misses or something like that. He is known as screwing up a lot of things, really.

This is it. This is the moment we all been waiting for. The final showdown.

Now, I am lying here in agonizing pain but he won't see me flinch, I won't and I refuse him to see the satisfaction of me screaming and suffering. I wonder what Hermione will do when she finds out I didn't make it. Will she be sad? Disappointed? Or happy, that Harry survived and that the Dark Lord is finally dead? Maybe she will shed a tear of me being gone but honestly why would she? She is better off without me anyway.

I feel like I am slowly slipping away. I must be dying or passing out from pain. I see her face with a soft smile on it but then her face disappears in the middle of green flashing light. I hope its Potter, I hope he won. I really hope he didn't miss. And then everything went black.

* * *

_Liked it? Didn't? Let me know._

_Some feedback would be very much appreciated._


	2. Chapter 2

_Remember when I told you its not going to be a long story, well there is only one chapter left. I honestly thought myself it would be a little bit longer but hey, there isn't anything I can really do with this story after the next chapter._

_I am somewhat struggling with the ending I can't decide how I want it to end. I have rewrote it a good few times. So, it may take a while before I am satisfied with it and I can put it up._

_Enjoy this chapter. I hope you like it. :)_

**Chapter 2**

As you can see it didn't all end in death and destruction. I am still alive as you figured that out by now. It's nice here. It's quiet and soothing. My cuts from the curse don't hurt anymore. Nurses always take care of me. I never feel that it's too quiet or too lonely in here. If I don't have visitors Nurses always come in and talk to me. Their quiet nice, I'll tell you, they seem to make a fuss about me, which is nice. I am in St. Mungo's, I'm not going to be here long, just long enough to heal me and make sure I don't have any other issues like post - traumatic stress disorder or depression. I say it's going to take a couple of weeks till I get out, but I don't mind. Really, I don't.

Your probably wondering how it all turned out but I am just talking here about myself like a Malfoy would, obviously. But, if you must know, yes Potter won. I never doubted him. Okay, I did, but that's not the point here. We actually won and I even got to survive. Who would have thought I would make it out alive? I didn't, but looks like Potter didn't let me bleed to death. It's nice of him, I guess.

You are probably dying to know what happened with Hermione and me, right? See, the truth is; nothing happened and isn't happening. She has visited me couple of times, not much really she seems different and distant. I don't know why. I probably don't want to know. The truth is its killing me. It really is. It's not like I imagined she would jump me and we would live happily ever after. That would make me sound vain. Not that I'm not. I am Malfoy after all, but the war has changed me. It really has.

Well the first time she visited me, she hugged me and was worried about me, and we talked for a bit. It was really nice. I felt that she understood why I did what I did. She was happy I was okay and I was happy that she was here and we can spend time together. Yes, yes even in a hospital it was nice; it wasn't in the middle of the war were we had to look over our shoulders just in case someone found us. This was different, believe me, it was. It felt like all the time in the world stopped and it was just me and her. She soon left though, I don't know where and why, but she said she is going to visit soon. She did come visit me. Not as much as I thought she would, but it's better than nothing right? Anyway, she was different after the first time. We didn't talk much, just maybe few words in and there. It wasn't as she just got cold towards me; oh no it happened over the visits. Her visits became less and the time she spent here decreased too. It was like she just comes to visit me out of politeness. It's a weird feeling. It's killing me to know why she is this way, but I don't want to push it. I don't want to lose her completely, this is better than not having her at all. It's been a week since she came to visit me. I don't know where she is and why isn't she coming to visit me. I don't want to look like I'm prying or anything. That's why I don't ask around. I could if I wanted to, and trust me I want to, but as you all say Malfoy pride is way too big for that.

So here I am now. Sitting in my bed and looking outside my bed side window. Thinking, yes thinking about her and trust me I do this every day.

Someone walks in; I don't even need to turn around to know it's her. Yes, I know it sound all pathetic that I know her smell and presence without even looking.

I am looking at her now. God, she looks beautiful.

She doesn't say anything, but I can see there is something on her mind. Do you know how I know that? I noticed when there is something on her mind and something she want to say she has the cutest worried face in the world. She bites her lip and look around the room. She never finds the particular point that she stops to look at and calms her down, though.

Now she is sitting down opposite of me and is looking me straight in the eyes. Did I mention her eyes are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen? She looks sad though. It's killing me to know, but I don't say anything.

'Hey, how are you doing?' she says in a surprisingly calm tone.

'I am better now, nurses think I'll be able to go home soon' I say back to her and she just nods her head. We sit there for a while in silence, not knowing what to say. It's different now, as I said before. Since when did it become so hard to talk to her, since when don't I know what to say anymore?

'Look, I am sorry I haven't been visiting as much' she breaks the silence and looks at me and she genuinely looks sorry.

'It's alright. 'I say to her. Because it is, it really is. She is here now.

'I just have been really busy.. with stuff.' I want to ask her what kind of stuff but I don't. I don't because I am afraid of the answer. Instead I just say; 'Yeah, I understand. I never imagined Potter would come visit me more than you do. I didn't even expect to see him ever again.' I laugh while saying this and to my surprise she laughs too. I missed her laugh. It has been a long time since I saw her like this. Again silence falls among us, but this isn't as uncomfortable as the first one. And even this time again, she is the one who breaks it.

'Look, I am just going to come out and say it before I chicken out again' she says looking at me and again the same sad expression on her face is back there is no sign that she ever even laughed. 'It's just I don't know how to say this to you, we've been through so much and I don't want to ruin our friendship or whatever we have here by this.' I look at her rambling on and on and don't say a thing. I am just waiting for her to continue. 'So here it goes, Iamgettingmarried.' It was hard to understand but I did and trust me my heart dropped the moment I heard it.

'Who is he?'

That must have been the stupidest question I could ask. I already know the answer. I hope I am wrong, though. Even if I wanted to say something else it's better that I don't. I may say something I will regret later.

'Ron' she isn't looking at me anymore, she is looking at her lap now.

I am not surprised by her answer. I already knew.

Every inch in my body says to tell her; don't, I love you. But all that comes out is;

'I am happy for you, I wish nothing else but happiness to you and Ronald.'

Now she is looking at me again, probably surprised I said Weasels first name. What was I supposed to say? Clearly she doesn't feel the same way about me. I can't show her that I am affected by her decisions. Her next sentence surprises me. She stands straight up and looks me in the eyes.

'That's all you're going to say to me?' As I said it surprised me. What did she expect me to beg?

'I don't understand you. You come here and say you're getting married to the stupid Weasel and saying you don't want to ruin our friendship. There isn't really anything else I can say here, Granger.'

It may have not been the right thing to say, but damn it feels good to say what I think for once. I will regret this. I know I will.

She just looks at me shocked for a while. Then she just looks away for a moment but when she looks back all I see is anger towards me.

'You know what I think? You are coward, Malfoy.' Ouch that stung, but I don't let her see any emotions on my face.

'I am the coward? You're the coward here, choosing to be with the safest option. You just come in here drop a bomb on me and expect something from me?' I may have raised my voice at her but it doesn't matter there is no going back.

'You are afraid to admit how you feel.' She says this so quietly that I do really have to wonder did she say it at all. But I know she did, its written all over her face.

There is really nothing to say here anymore. It hurts me it really does, but I have to let her go.

'There is nothing to admit. You're getting married now and I won't stand in the way of your happily ever after just don't drag me in to your freaking parade.' She is looking at me now. All I can really do is just look back.

None of us are saying anything for a while just staring at each other. Again, she is the one that breaks our silence.

'I guess we are done here then.' She says looking down at the floor. I can't tell if she is sad, angry or happy about it.

'I guess so' she starts to walk away and I just stare at her back, but before she walks out the door she turns around. She opens her mouth to say something, but she doesn't. Instead she closes it and turns to walk away.

Well, I guess we all know what this means. Our, whatever this was, is over. I go to sit down on my bed and I know I won't see her again; at least not for a long time. I may have survived but I lost her. Trust me I wish I died in the war. Nothing could have hurt me as much as she did now. It was stupid of me to hope she would ever choose me, anyway. I didn't get my hopes up. I swear I didn't. But it still hurts knowing that she chose someone else.

I know she did feel something towards me, but it was in the middle of the war. Maybe she has loved that weasel all along and I was just a spur of a moment decision. People tend to do crazy things when they're in the middle of the war. Now that it's all over she sees the light, she sees more sense. Maybe after all it was the right decision to let her go. It kills me to say this, it really does. But I wish her nothing but happiness in life. I mean it, I really do.


	3. Chapter 3

_Well, this is it, the last chapter. I am still not quiet happy how I wrote this chapter, but I have changed it way too much that I don't even want to look at it anymore :D So, I hope you'll all like it. _

_I wish you all a happy new year! :) xx _

* * *

**Chapter 3**

It's been 2 months now. I haven't seen here since the hospital. I am out now of course, but we haven't spoken. I did receive her invitation to her wedding which took place on the 23rd of August, which was a week ago. I didn't go. Why would I? I can't believe she expected me to be there. It would truly hurt me to see her walk down the aisle to another man. I would have probably tried to change her mind but I can't be selfish with her, I just can't.

I was startled from my thought with a loud knock on my door. I wonder who would come visit me now. Maybe it's Potter, I haven't seen him since the day before the wedding. It is quiet weird that we are kind of friend with Potter, that is if I could call us that. He has been decent towards me and I have no idea why he insists on visiting, it's not that I mind it its nice for a change not to offend each other and have a glass of fire whiskey together. I guess war does change people.

I was so lost in my thought that I had opened the door and just assumed its Potter and had glasses of whiskey ready. What took me by surprise is that when I looked up it wasn't Potter at all. It was Hermione and she was still standing by the door. Not daring to come in. I decided to play it cool.

'Are you just going to stand there or come in to join me for a drink?' She was surprised by what I said but didn't say anything back. She came in and sat opposite of me in my green furry chair. Don't judge they happen to be extremely comfy. I pass her one of the glasses of whiskey and to my surprise she downs it all in one go. I do the same thing. I can instantly feel the effect of it but I decide I need another to get the courage to face her. I pour some in my glass and without offering some in hers. She doesn't seem to mind it. She doesn't even spare a glance at me and just downs it again. She must be as nervous as me then, good I'm not the only one.

'So tell me what brings you here?' This time, for a change I am the first one who breaks the silence. She looks up at me a bit startled as if she had forgotten I was here at all.

'Well, I haven't seen you since the incident in the hospital and I was wondering how you are doing. Plus I came here to apologize.' She said.

'No need to apologize. It was as much as your fault as mine.' I said, not even sure what I was supposed to say. I couldn't just say; yeah well you broke my heart that day. No. That would worsen all this situation and I have to admit it's nice to see her again. It really is.

She didn't say anything back; instead she took another shot of whiskey.

'So how is Weasel doing?' I mentally kicked myself for even bringing this up.

Why would I do that? Why would I hurt myself more? I guess I asked because there was nothing else to say. Probably was but curiosity got the best of me.

'He is good, I suppose.' she said uneasy.

I wonder what's going on with her and the Weasel these days.

'I don't really feel like talking about him.' She continued and I can swear she sounded bitter.

Now I definitely think there is something off with her and Weasel. I wonder what the looser did now, a girl like that and always messing things up. If it were me in his place, wait that's the point here exactly it's not me. Nothing I can really do about it now or say what would be different because it will never happen. Really I should stop this before I go insane, not that I am not already. I am just not completely insane yet, and I do want to refrain myself from getting there.

I was so lost in my thought that I had completely forgotten about Hermione, being here. So you are not going to believe what happened next. I was surprised myself. I still am.

She suddenly looked at me and leaned over the table to kiss me. Her lips touched mine softly. I didn't stop her. I knew it was wrong, she was married and all. But I couldn't stop myself for tasting her one last time. Maybe it was because we were both drunk or because we both wanted it. I really hope it is the second.

I was so lost in our kiss that I longed for so much. That I didn't notice that we both somehow managed to stand up and get away from the table. Her hands were tangled in my hair and my arms rested gently on her hips, afraid of making one false move, afraid it is going to end.

She pulled away to my disappointment. But she didn't look like she regretted it or anything. Her eyes were still closed, her arms where still around my neck and she was savouring the remains of our kiss.

Finally she pulled away. I didn't want to let her go. I had no choice though. What could I do? She is married. This shouldn't have happened. She shouldn't have given me false hope again.

She went to sit back at her chair she was sitting in before and motioned me to sit in front of her.

I went to sit down, of course. Afraid of what's going to happen next.

'I have something to say to you. I am so sorry that I didn't tell you this sooner but I was afraid.' She said to me looking straight in the eyes and I knew she was being honest with me and she was still terrified of whatever she wants to tell me.

'Go ahead; I am not going to bite.' I said smirking and winking at her.

She took a deep breath.

'I didn't marry Ron.' She was looking away from me now. I could see she was ashamed.

I can't even describe how happy I feel right now. I can't let her see that, obviously.

'Why?' I asked instead.

'It's simple, I don't love him, he is not the one for me and I guess I have been in love with someone else for a while now.'

A blimp of hope entered my heart. I still couldn't let myself believe that she would not marry Weasel because of me. Where was she sooner then? Why didn't she come straight to me? It must be someone else then.

'Why are you telling me this?' I asked her clenching my fist because I couldn't believe she would choose someone else again.

'Because, you are the one I want to be with.' I couldn't believe what I was hearing. She actually wants to be with me.

Obviously, the Malfoy I am, I am not letting her off easy, as much as I want to.

'Then why are you telling me these things two months later, after making me believe you were married to someone else.'

'I was scared Draco, I was scared you wouldn't feel the same way. I was scared of even having feelings for you. That's why I chose to marry Ron, as you already said I chose the safest option.'

I smiled at her. She looked really confused at my reaction, probably because she wasn't prepared for this.

'You know, for the brightest witch of our ages you can be bloody thick sometimes.' I said laughing at her and all I could she is hurt in her eyes. No, she got me completely wrong.

'Don't get me wrong, I meant it as you being bloody stupid for thinking I would not feel the same way about you.' I said smiling at her.

She just laughed at me nervously. So I said the only thing that I longed to say to her for years now.

'I love you, Hermione. Don't ever doubt it.' I said to her softly.

She looked at me for a while still processing what I said to her.

'I love you to.' She finally admitted and smiled at me. She went to plant a soft kiss on my lips. I could get used to this. This is truly heaven.

* * *

_**3 years later**_

'Hurry up Malfoy, it's going to start any minute now.' Potter yelled at me excitedly.

I looked at myself on last time in the mirror; still not believing that this day has actually come. I make my way out of the dressing room and towards the stairs that lead to the back garden.

'I feel nervous' I say to Potter.

He just looks at me and says; 'Don't be, mate. There is nothing to be worried about.'

This is probably the best day of my life.

I am marrying Hermione Granger, and there she is now making her way up to the altar, which we built at the back of my garden, or should I say our garden.

She is here now besides me, smiling and looking so beautiful in her white dress. I can't believe it.

The man from the Ministry, Rufus, is talking now. I don't really know what he is; I just know he works with all the magical couples getting married. Does he count as a priest or what? Well that is not important now. The most important thing is standing next to me.

As you can see I have been through a lot. I have lost my family and my status in the magical world. But, I have gained so much along the way. I have gained love and friends that will last forever. That is so much more than I was raised up to; money and pride. That means nothing if you don't have friends and a person you love to share it with.

Hell, I even thought I am going to day way before I even was on the light side. So, in my time of dying I have lost so many things along the way, but in return I gained so much more than I could ever ask for. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Finally the moment has come when I get to say to her; I do.

Then the man moves on to her to ask her the same thing that all of you already know. I let out a shaky breath. I still have my doubts and I am still scared that she would change her mind about me, yes still after all this time. Finally she answers with the sweetest smile; 'I do.'

Her answer couldn't make me happier and finally I get to kiss her, my Hermione and now my wife. I am truly the happiest man in the world.

I can hear clapping and whistling in the background. But all I can see and think about is rest of our lives together.

_**The End**_


End file.
